Phoenix Rising
by Rainbowscape
Summary: In the wake of a battle, Beka Valentine is slated to become captain.
1. Default Chapter

**DISCLAIMER:** This story is based upon the television show Gene Roddenberry's Andromeda owned by Tribune Entertainment. It is not affiliated with any of the above. It is created for free entertainment only and no copyright infringement is intended.   
**A/N:** A Beka story that has been brewing in my head for a long while. I like how it's flowing so far and the next part will be posted once I've polished it.   
**RATING:** PG13   
**CATEGORY:** Angst, Drama, Angst, consider yourself warned.   
**TIMELINE:** Second Season Andromeda, Alternate Universe   
**FEEDBACK:** I love it!:)   


**PHOENIX RISING**

_by Leah_

Copyright 2003

**1**

It was a haunting cry. 

The lingering wail echoed through the _Andromeda Ascendent_, reverberating against its very walls, eerie not only in the evocative nature of the cry, but in the fact that it streamed from every intercom, poured over every comlink, broadcast on all bandwidths into space itself. 

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" 

The High Guard ship pitched and rolled, hurtling through space, caught by the riptide of the AI's fury in her grief. 

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" 

The endlessly repeated howl became like a wind, surrounding everything. 

In the midst of this cry a singular human voice struggled to be heard. 

"Andromeda!" 

The wailing and rolling of the ship did not cease, only varying in length and intensity. 

The voice was louder this time, shouting above the roar. "Andromeda, respond!" 

A particularly harsh pitch threw _Andromeda_'s first officer against the wall. She rose to her knees, leaning her back against the wall for support. Beka Valentine cupped her hand over her comlink, drawing it as close to her mouth as possible so her voice might be heard over and through the wail, and switched to a new tack. In a voice that was both hysterical and hopeful, she asked, "Harper?" 

It seemed an eternity before Harper's disbelieving voice now accompanied the wail on her comlink. "Boss! Thank goodness you're alright." 

With a rush of the same sentiment, Beka allowed herself a sigh of relief and then went straight to the problem at hand. "Harper! I can't get helm control. Auto pilot's engaged and the AI's not responding." 

Lights were flickering and sparks were flying from the consoles on the Command Deck. Not trusting the erratic movements of the ship, Beka dragged herself back to the pilot's station, climbed into the pilot's chair, and strapped herself into it. 

After a moment, Harper's voice chirped. "Can't give you manual override from here. Rommie's gotta give you control." 

"She's not answering." Beka pressed back a stray blonde lock from her eyes. For him to know this much, Harper must have gained partial access to _Andromeda_'s systems. This thought prompted her next question. "Her location?" 

Harper didn't fail her. "Looks like the main part of Med Deck." 

The screens all about the Command Deck blinked on and off. Images of a space battle captured just hours earlier, played erratically. 

"I knew this wasn't a good idea," a deep voice bellowed. Tyr appeared in the doorway, steadying himself it seemed by sheer will as he released his hold on the entrance and walked into Command. "The ship has gone mad!" 

"Tyr?" It was hard to believe anyone was alright, even the stoic Tyr, when so recently many things had gone so wrong. Beka allowed her seat to pull back from the station and turned towards the sound of the Nietzschean's voice. 

She stared. There he was, large as life. "Tyr," she repeated, releasing her seat buckle and nearly getting flung to the floor in the process. "Take over here. I have to find Rommie." 

"Internal defenses are active," Tyr warned, brandishing his gauss rifle. "Where is she? I'll go." 

Beka shook her head. "_Andromeda_'s my responsibility now. So is Rommie. And if all of this--" Beka gestured to the state of things. "Indicates her state of mind, I'd rather be the one to go. Stay here, once we switch over to manual, I'm counting on you to slip us to safer territory. There's no telling what kind of attention we've attracted." 

Beka moved towards the door, but Tyr blocked her way. She raised her chin and looked up into his eyes, wondering if he was going to argue with her. 

He stared back at her a moment. "Take this." He placed the rifle in her hands and stepped aside. He strode purposefully over to a console. "I'll do my best to monitor your progress from here." 

Beka gave a short nod, amazed that anything should actually go her way today, and left Command Deck. 

She sprinted through the corridors and climbed ladders, thanking the adrenaline that coursed through her veins for the speed of her traverse. Only one corridor gave her problems, but Tyr's voice over the comlink warned her in time. 

When internal defenses fired on her, she somersaulted to safety, shot the gauss rifle and ended the offending barrage. Harper would chide her later about the damage, but she'd worry over such trivialities later. 

She felt the change in the atmosphere as soon as she entered it. The AG fields were slightly stronger in Medical than in the corridor outside, so the contents of the room had shifted less than elsewhere. Whether this was by accident or by design, she didn't know. 

The lights were dimmed and the prevalent wail rose to the point where it was nearly unbearable to hear. 

Frowning, Beka scanned the room, caught a glimpse of a familiar figure in a red uniform, and approached the android. 

Rommie lay huddled in a corner, her hands over her ears, and her eyes closed. She periodically shook her head as if fighting some sort of unseen battle. As Beka drew closer, she heard Rommie repeating several words in a mechanical way. "A match. A match. DNA test results. A match. A match." 

It was disturbing, to say the least. "Rommie, it's Beka. Can you hear me?" 

Rommie's eyes shot open. She lowered her hands. "Beka?" 

"Yes. What's happening to you?" 

The voice that answered sounded too low and too dull, as if at any moment it would break into a scream. "It matched, Beka. The tests. The DNA." Rommie covered her ears once again as another cry shuddered throughout the ship. 

Beka felt the floor shiver and braced herself for the lurch that was sure to follow. 

Then, Beka grabbed Rommie's arm, forcing the android to uncover one ear. "Listen! Some systems are overloading. We're flying out of control. Whatever's going on, I need you to stop it. Restore helm control." 

"He's gone." Rommie blinked. "I don't want to feel it, Beka. I shut it out. I don't think I--" 

"Shut what out? You're responsible for this?" 

The ship tilted violently. 

Beka dropped to her knees. "We don't have time to discuss this. Our lives are on the line. Do you hear me? This ship is out of control. I need you take us off auto pilot. Do whatever you have to do, but stop this now! That's an order." 

Rommie bowed her head and closed her eyes. "Compartmentalizing. Terminating link with mainframe. Process complete." 

Instant silence fell. 

Beka regained her equilibrium as the crazy dives, bucks, and rolls of the ship ceased. 

"Good work, Captain Valentine." Tyr's voice broke the stillness over the comlink. "Helm control has been reestablished." 

Beka breathed deeply, surprised she had been holding her breath. "Get us out of here." 

The welcome feel of entering a slipstream porthole followed. As _Andromeda_ headed towards temporary safety, exhaustion took over Beka's limbs. She rocked back on her heels and tried to catch her breath. Up until this point, she had been reacting out of necessity, but now she allowed herself the luxury of a clear-cut thought. 

She might have kept the reflection at bay for a moment longer, but looking over at the mournful android, sitting on the floor before her, the thought struck with shattering and startling force. 

Rommie raised her head and confirmed the thought even before it could travel to Beka's lips. "He's dead, Beka. Dylan's dead." 


	2. Captain Valentine

A/N: Natta, loved your reaction to what happened to Dylan.:) I've had similiar reactions like that myself, especially in light of what's been happening in the actual Andromeda universe. Parsindy, thanks so much for your review and here's the next chapter.  
  


**2**

**Captain Valentine**

Her rest was troubled. 

She tossed and turned under her covers and finally rose, wondering what new horrors the day would bring that her own nightmares had missed. 

Captain Beka Valentine of the _Andromeda Ascendant_. It had an odd ring to it. Beka couldn't help feel that in some strange way, she was being disloyal to the _Eureka Maru_. That had always been her ship. And now, due to the sudden turn of events beyond her control, she was the captain of two ships. Could one be captain of two ships at the same time? Thrown into the position, she couldn't stop such questions from rising. 

Sleep did not nothing to alleviate the shock and confusion. 

Her latest orders as Acting Captain, were that everyone get some desperately needed rest, followed by breakfast in the morning. 

She idly wondered if all the crew would show up in the galley as she'd requested. What was left of the crew, she amended the thought. Would they care about what she had to say? Breakfast had been a pretense. She wanted to gather everyone together in a less formal setting, because formalities at the moment would only remind them of what they had lost. 

Talking to Harper several hours ago, Beka had decided that reminders of that kind were to be avoided. She had broken the news to him gently, knowing how much the young engineer had looked up to the older man, and waited for his reaction. 

A pained look flashed into Harper's eyes and he clenched his teeth. "If we had waited for Trance." 

"We couldn't wait for her. Like Dylan said, it would have been too late by then." 

Harper scowled. The anger in his voice rose. "It was too late, for him anyways. And where did Trance decide to jet off to anyways all of a sudden? Wow, I bet if she'd--" 

Beka understood Harper's anger, even if it was misdirected. Dylan dead. Trance missing. "Harper, it's easy to point fingers after the fact. No one knows for sure." 

"Yeah," said Harper, turning away. "But maybe if I'd--" 

Beka slipped an arm around Harper's shoulder, pulling him into a backwards, one-armed hug. "It's not your fault either, Seamus." Then, she grabbed his shoulders and turned him around to face her. "Quit blaming yourself. The last thing we need is anyone doubting their abilities. You got that?" 

Harper stared down at feet, trying to hide his face. "Yeah," he sniffed. "I got it, Beka. I got it. But what do we do now, huh? Without--" Harper stopped, unable to say it. "Well, what then? What now?" 

A look of determination came into Beka's face. "We keep going." 

"With what? The mission?" Harper's voice shook incredulously. "We know how well that went the last time. So, how can we…" 

"Success or failure aside, those people still need our help. If we don't intervene those people become slaves or worse, part of painful scientific experiments. Can you live with that?" 

Harper met Beka's eye for a moment, staring defiance. Then, suddenly his shoulders slumped and his expression softened. "I think I better go see about damages and repairs. Where do ya want me to start, boss?" 

"Check life support," said Beka, transitioning easily from the role of friend to commanding officer. "Then, defenses." 

Harper nodded and jogged off down the corridor, heavy tools swinging on his belt, accounting for his peculiar gait. 

She watched him go, grateful there were still some things in the universe that never change. 

Walking so deep in her reflections had slowed her progress to breakfast, Beka arrived at last in the hall outside the galley and there she was forced to halt in the corridor. 

Tyr stood squarely in her path. "Is this some kind of joke? I am not laughing." 

"What?" asked Beka. 

"Is what the ship told me true?" Tyr clarified. His tone implied that a ship which so recently had nearly killed them all was not to be trusted. 

"Yes." Beka nodded. "About Dylan." She didn't feel much need to elaborate. He could ask Andromeda and easily discover that in the midst of the battle fray, the Andromeda had pulled in several life pods. And that inside one of them-- 

Tyr persisted. "Dylan? Is that D as in defies all odds." 

"That's D as in dead body. D as in DNA matched. D as in definitely." 

Tyr's face was blank for a moment. "I would like to say I am not surprised, but I am. Captain Dylan Hunt survived a longer length of time than I would have ever supposed." 

"Don't--" Part of her wanted to be angry at him for such a statement. Another part of her wanted to heartily agree. Beka choked back a laugh, admiring how Tyr could be humorous at such a time. 

Tyr rubbed his chin once and then folded his hands together and pointed at her with them, as if grasping the thought. "That means you are captain of this ship." 

Beka arched her eyebrows and looked back at Tyr. Hearing the words made it seem so final. "Yeah, pretty much." 

"Are you ready for that?" 

Beka crossed her arms and glanced away from Tyr's inquiring gaze. She couldn't help but remember a similar conversation which had happened when they'd only been aboard _Andromeda_ a short time. Mutiny had been in the air then, and neither of them had trusted Dylan much at all. Tyr had suggested Beka would be a more desirable captain and her reply had been, "I'm not ready for that." 

Now, here she was, captain of the one of the most powerful ships in the universe. 

Beka raised her chin and snapped, "Is anyone?" 

Tyr shrugged once. "What are your intentions now, Captain Valentine?" 

Beka held up her hand. "Make you my first officer, so call me Beka." She gestured toward the galley door. "We need to talk with the crew, exchange ideas and map out what we're going to do next." 

"Do next?" Tyr asked, quirking an eyebrow. "You are not still thinking of going through with the mission?" 

Beka pulled herself up taller. "I made a promise I intend to keep." 

Tyr tilted his head. "If the purpose of this meeting is truly to exchange ideas, I am forced to disagree with an endeavor that will end for us the same as it did for Captain Hunt. Dylan was a dreamer. Dreams often do not survive when struck with harsh realities of the day." 

Beka moved forward, brushing Tyr out of her way. "Neither do pessimists." 

Tyr turned towards her. "I beg to differ, a pessimist would predict imminent failure. I am merely performing my duty. A first officer should always point out the flaws in the plans of his captain before anyone else can find them." 

"Oh, really?" Beka walked back to Tyr, grinning. "Don't you think you would serve me better if you heard what the details of the plan are first?" 

The Nietzschean had no reply to that. 

When Beka headed for the door once more, Tyr followed. 


	3. Best Laid Plans

A/N: Queencj, yes, of course, I plan to explain how Dylan died and why he wasn't on board. D. Lerious, thanks for the review. And Rommie's voice, thanks for the almost review.:) Thanks to those of you who have been reading and reviewing my older stories, that's so encouraging! Here's another update to Phoenix Rising!  
**

3

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**

Best Laid Plans

**

The table at breakfast was strangely silent. Free from both clatter and chatter, it seemed as if the contents of individuals' plates disappeared too rapidly or else not at all. Rommie did not need to eat. Tyr ate heartily. Harper stirred the contents of his plate and sipped coffee. 

Beka tried to set an example and ate, surprised by how starved she actually felt once the food touched her palate. Sit down meals had not been a priority during the past week. A week. It was hard to believe that most of this trouble had started a mere seven days ago. 

An age had passed since then, since Beka had stared at the determined face of a High Guard captain and objected, "You're not going to be on _Andromeda_ for this mission? Dylan, I really think you should think this through. Take the _Maru_ at least." 

Dylan's plan had begun as most plans of his began. He was closing negotiations for a new planet to join the Commonwealth. The planet was very eager to join, but the stipulations of their treaty agreement were that all their colonies were to be included as well. Thus, protecting these colonies as well the planet would be part of _Andromeda's_ responsibility. The agreement would not have been more of a problem than usual, except one of the planet's colonial settlements rested right on the fringes of an area of space that was disputed over by a pride of Nietzscheans and the Genites. Two groups who could not hate each other more if the parties had tried. 

The new treaty was finalized, and as if on cue, open hostilities broke out between the Nietzschean pride and the Genites, leaving the small colony on the edge of a battle zone. 

And Captain Dylan Hunt felt impelled to save the universe from chaos once again. 

Only this time, Beka felt there was something amiss with his plans. 

"Beka, I don't need the _Maru_ for this one. They have a ship." 

"Dylan, we're only just getting to know these people. Surely, they can evacuate one colony without." 

"If they wanted to do that we'd support them." 

"They're not evacuating? Then, exactly what is the plan?" 

"If you need to know that, I'll tell you. Trust me." 

Beka couldn't help but feel irked at the reply. The more the Commonwealth grew, the less it seemed Dylan felt the need to tell his own crew. His plans and his Commonwealth dealings were repeatedly cloaked in mystery. Often, his replies to questions she ventured to ask reminded her, more and more, of the secretive Trance. 

Trance. 

The thought of her enigmatic but absent friend jolted Beka out of her recollections. She stared across the table at the vacant spot Trance usually occupied. Then, she took another forkful of breakfast and forced her mind to return to the present business at hand. 

Harper provided her with a quick run down of his accomplishments since their last conversation. "So, I organized the repair work into three categories. Finished, Working On It, and That Can Wait Until Later." 

Beka nodded, listening attentively, then asked, "Where does that leave the engines and slipstream?" 

"Under the category, Finished. Up and running. Right as rain." Harper added sugar to his coffee, stirred it in, and then returned to shifting the contents of his plate. 

"I've assigned the majority of my maintenance drones to assist Harper," Rommie added, mechanically. The android sat stiffly at the table, with her eyes straight ahead of her and her hands folded neatly, rested on the tabletop. "Also Mister Mendelsen has been asking to speak to you." 

"Mendelsen?" asked Beka, vaguely recalling having heard such a name before. 

"Yes," Rommie replied. "The most vocal leader of the passengers we acquired when the life pods were brought aboard." 

"Oh ." Beka had hardly given the extra people any thought until now. 

The android frowned, the first display of any kind of emotion Beka had seen Rommie display this morning. "He has become quite insistent to speak with you. He demands to know why we haven't slipped farther into the Safe Zone and are still on the perimeter." 

"I'm sure he does," Beka replied, absently. She watched as Harper dropped the spoon he'd been using to stir his yet uneaten portion of food. A thoughtful frown appeared on her forehead. "Harper said sensors are good. Rommie, can you plot a course back to the coordinates where we were going to meet Trance? Before all this started?" 

"Yes." 

"Do it." 

A fork clattered to the floor. Tyr, half rising from his chair, appeared on the verge of protest. "This is your plan? To go back to a place where our enemies might expect to find us?" 

Pushing her plate aside, Beka leaned forward in her chair. "Trance is a part of my crew and I'm not going to leave her behind. If she's still out there, she'll try and find us. She's done it before, you know her guessing abilities, but I want to increase her odds." 

Tyr stared at her across the table. "Need I remind you that our weapons are not yet fully operational?" 

"Slip fighters are!" Harper put in, shouting the words. He reached forward and grabbed a piece of toast. "I'll finish the rest of 'em after breakfast." 

Beka watched Tyr's expression and nodded approvingly at Harper. "Slip fighters should be all we need as long as we're prepared to operate them." 

Her eyes rested on Tyr, challengingly. "Are you prepared for that?" 

Tyr tossed his napkin onto his emptied plate. "I'll do what needs to be done." 

Somehow, that answer wasn't what she was looking for, but it would do for now. The decision made, Beka rose to her feet and turned towards the door. "Feel free to finish breakfast, I'm going to have a chat with this Mendelsen." 

As she turned, out of the corner of her eye, she spied Harper taking huge bites of toast and inhaling the conglomeration of food on his plate. A smile appeared briefly on her lips. She had succeeded in restoring a semblance of peace to her engineer's mind, and that was reward enough against any opposition she might face from other quarters. 

Stepping out the door, Beka gestured to Rommie to follow. The new captain of the _Andromeda_ wondered how Mister Mendelsen would react when he discovered the ship was slipping farther into, instead of away from, disputed territory. 

Rommie's short description of the man hadn't been much, but the diplomatic avatar had a way of putting things nicely. 

Beka had a feeling it wasn't going to be pretty.


	4. Promises

**

4

**  
**

Promises

**

Glancing over her shoulder in the corridor, Beka regarded the slow-stepping avatar behind her. "How you doin' Rommie?" 

Rommie paused before her reply. "I am a bit surprised that you didn't address what happened yesterday." 

Beka sighed. "Too much happened yesterday." 

"Almost too much to process," Rommie agreed. "I have taken the liberty of doing a sensory scan--examining all the life pods we brought aboard. Trying to reconstruct a picture of how--" She frowned. "I keep thinking that maybe if I…If I just could!" 

The vehemence of the voice froze Beka in her tracks. Half turning, she watched Rommie and said, "Go on." 

The avatar's brown eyes followed several people traversing the corridor. "Privately." 

Beka shrugged, permissively. "Okay. We'll talk after we see Mister Mendelsen." 

The doors parted and Beka and Rommie stepped into one of the quarters that had been assigned to the refugees. 

They were greeted by a brown-haired, brown-eyed man dressed in a blue uniform. He whistled disdainfully, looking at his timepiece, and sneered. "Well, it's about time!" 

Captain Valentine nodded, trying to do her best diplomatic impression. "Mister Mendelsen, I presume. I hear you've been asking for me." 

"So, the good Captain Valentine has at last decided to grace us with her presence. I was beginning to think you'd forgotten about us." He paced up and down, lightly kicking the wall at odd times, as if the area were too small for him. 

"Not at all. We picked up a lot of life pods. What ship did you come from?" 

"Does it matter?" Mendelsen asked. "My ship is destroyed, doubtless my planet soon will be too." 

Standing to one side, Rommie glared upon him. "He claims to have come from the _Firelight_. Unfortunately, my records are sketchy on that front." 

"Why? Were your records damaged in the attack?" Beka questioned, surprised this vital bit of information hadn't been in the morning report. 

"I have backups," Rommie replied, defensively. "All the lost data can be restored. It requires time." 

Beka nodded and turned back towards their guest. "Then, let's go to the source. What exactly do you do, Mister Mendelsen?" 

"I am an observer." 

"Of what?" 

Mendelsen's eyes sparkled with malice. "It doesn't matter to you." 

"Let me be the judge of that," Beka replied. 

"Maybe you shouldn't be the judge of anything," Mendelsen replied. "You lost your captain, I'm sure that's been difficult, but I have other worries as well." 

Beka pondered. "The _Firelight_ was the ship Dylan boarded. Were you working with Captain Hunt?" 

"Our paths crossed, but my superiors worked more closely with him. I'm afraid there's not a lot I can tell you." Mendelsen rubbed his hand over his chin. "I wanted to talk to with you particularly, Captain Valentine. I and the others are concerned by your lack of communication with us." 

"Well, the feeling's mutual," Beka replied. "So far you haven't told me anything I didn't already know. So let's stop wasting time. In case you haven't noticed, I have a ship to run." 

Mendelsen smiled, condescendingly. "You've suffered a loss, your ship has obviously been damaged and frankly, I don't feel safe." 

"Maybe you shouldn't feel safe," Rommie snapped. The man had taken a step forward and Rommie reacted suddenly, grabbing Mendelsen up by his shirt collar. She arched her brow. "Maybe I should let you off right now. There's an airlock not far from here--I could open it." 

Shocked, the man twisted to free himself, but the android held him effortlessly in one hand, keeping his feet from touching the floor. 

"Rommie?" Beka questioned with concern. Mendelsen might be annoying, but he was still a guest. Nothing he'd done thus far warranted this type of treatment. 

Rommie seemed not to hear. Her brown eyes glared at the man before her. When she spoke, her voice was unnaturally smooth. "Maybe you were the one." 

Mendelsen's face was turning red. His mouth gaped open as he gasped for air. 

Beka tried again. "Rommie, what are you doing?" 

Rommie seemed to hear Beka this time, but did not release her hold. Her focus was elsewhere. Her eyes looked glazed. "My records show his life pod number. His pod was the one right next to Dylan's. Yet, he claims to have no idea what happened to Captain Hunt. How can that be?" 

"Don't know--" Mendelsen panted. 

Rommie raised him higher. "What happened to Dylan?" 

"Put him down," Beka said, sharply. 

Rommie continued her violent questioning, as if Beka had not spoken at all. "Why did your pod protect you from the explosion? Why did his fail? How did you survive? _Why didn't Dylan?_" 

Interesting questions, thought Beka. But Mendelsen's air supply was clearly being cut off by the avatar's iron grip. She'd hoped for a moment that Rommie might be playing Good Cop, Bad Cop, but this was ridiculous. Beka grasped her force lance, readying it. She didn't want to, but if push came to shove. "Rommie! Drop him." 

Perhaps it was the clear cut command in her tone that caused Rommie to turn her head. Her eyes flicked momentarily to the force lance in Beka's hand, but she did not meet Beka's gaze. "As ordered. Yes, captain." She released her hold. 

Mendelsen dropped, face first, to the floor.. 

Rommie took a step backward, folding her hands behind her back in an official stance. A frown was etched on her face. 

Watching Rommie warily, Beka interposed herself between the avatar and the man. Still keeping one eye on the wayward android, Beka looked down at Mendelsen. Felt his neck. A pulse and still breathing! She activated her comlink. "One for Medical." 

Searching for the answer to the strange behavior, Beka met Rommie's eyes. If she stared long enough she could almost hear the scream that wasn't there. 

xxx 

They left as soon as the Med team arrived. Mendelsen was in no shape to do any talking and Beka had mumbled some quick explanation about the man suffering from a fainting spell. 

After ushering Rommie out the door, Beka spoke softly, "Let's go to my office." 

Rommie started in the general direction of the Captain's Office, but Beka shook her head. 

"No, not that way. _My_ office." With these cryptic words, the captain headed off in a different direction altogether. 

Beka's office, proved to be, onboard her pride and joy, the _Eureka Maru_. If the thought occurred to her that this was a minor absurdity to officiate _Andromeda_ matters on another ship, she let it pass. 

Rommie didn't comment on the oddity either. When it came Beka's behavior with anything concerning the _Eureka Maru_, Rommie had grown to accept that there were a lot of things outside logical comprehension. 

Beka paced quickly across the kitchen and pulled a coffee mug out of the cabinet. Captain's business or no, she rapidly decided she would take whatever respite she could on the _Maru_. She closed her eyes and breathed in the familiar scent of coffee, and felt the refreshing coolness of the _Maru's_ atmosphere against her cheeks. 

It was Rommie who broke the silence. 

"Beka?" 

"Yes." 

"Why didn't you tell them? When they came to get him? What had happened?" 

"I was wondering about that myself." Beka set her coffee mug on the table, curling her fingers around it. "You didn't mean to do it, did you?" 

Silence followed until Rommie spoke again. "Beka?" 

"Yes." 

"I…think you're right." 

"What?" Beka asked, wearily. Her eyebrows flew up. The tone in Rommie's voice unsettled her. She blinked. "What are you talking about?" 

"In what you said to me in the Medical Bay. When I was…when I--" The android groped painfully for words. 

"Lost it?" Beka provided the words, starting to understand. 

Rommie gave a nod. "Yes. For this reason, I have come to a….a decision." 

Beka gaped at the android, wondering what she could possibly be thinking. She didn't want to ask. 

Rommie pressed on. "I already placed myself and the crew in jeopardy. I don't want to risk doing that again." 

"Then, don't," said Beka, shortly. Irritation was rising. It really shouldn't, but at a time like this, she really was hoping Rommie wouldn't suffer from another…breakdown. Two times in two days was already too much. 

The next words were spoken quickly. "I understand if you want to take me offline. In fact, I recommend it." 

She couldn't actually be suggesting….! Beka counted to ten and turned to the distraught android. "Look, Rommie. This is hard. We're all under a lot of strain and pressure's through the roof but we need you right now. We need to focus." 

Whatever semblance of composure Rommie had been holding, broke. Her lips trembled as her eyes brimmed with tears. "I almost killed you," she whispered. "I almost killed you all. Everyone on board. You know the stories. You've seen firsthand what happens to old High Guard AI's that lose their captains. I thought I could control it, but with Mendelsen just now--" Rommie continued, "I am submitting this as an official request. You should. Before I--" 

"No!" An angry hand slapped the tabletop. The same hand whapped the wall as Beka paced around the room. "I won't listen to this! That is not going to happen to you." 

"But if you're wrong?" Rommie followed the officer's pacing with her eyes and kept speaking. "You should erase me. You'll still have the main AI, but I'll simply be--" Her voice trailed off and the thought with it. Then, Rommie added, "You don't understand." 

"I understand enough. Now, I need you to understand a thing or two." 

"But," the avatar objected. "It was me. I should have anticipated. I should have kept him from going. I should have--" 

"Rommie, you have the brain the size of a planet, but even you can't foresee everything. That isn't your responsibility. You lost Dylan. We all did. That does not give you the permission to give up. Grief, Rommie, is a perfectly human response." 

"Human? Maybe that is what is wrong with everything. Avatars were supposed to have an objective concern for their crews--but I broke the rules. I formed a strong emotional bond. My emotions became a liability. Avatars were tools of the Commonwealth, Beka! That's all. But I'm not human and I was never meant to be anything more than a useful extension of a war machine. I got angry and I'm not supposed to get angry! How am I supposed to handle an experience I was never supposed to have in the first place?" 

Beka halted, looked her in the eye, and asked, "What would Dylan say if he were hearing you now? Your request is officially denied." 

There was a space of silence between them. 

Rommie looked torn. Then, she snapped to attention suddenly. "Understood, Captain Valentine." She turned to go. 

"Wait! What are you afraid of Rommie? That'll you'll become like _Pax_? I'll tell you right now, that's never gonna happen. You are the heart of _Andromeda_ and a valuable crewmember. You're a part of my crew. So no matter how much you give up on yourself, I am not going to give up on you. We need you. Don't ever doubt that!" 

"Yes, captain." 

"One last thing. I may be Captain of the _Andromeda Ascendant_ now, but that doesn't change anything." 

"Any what?" 

"Don't salute me. You know how I hate that." 

Rommie managed the frailest of smiles. "Yes, Beka," she said and left through the bay door. 

The moment she had gone, Beka dropped down into a chair and cradled her head in hands. She felt limp. "You better be right, Valentine," she whispered to herself. 

It was only a little while later that she received a visit from her newly appointed first officer and, over a new cup of coffee, related the recent events. 

"She asked you what?" Tyr said in disbelief. "And you denied her request?" 

"Why would I consider it? How could I?" 

Tyr looked at her across the small tabletop. "Because, if she were a Nietzschean, she would be warning you not to trust her." 

Beka twisted in her seat. "She's not Nietzschean, Tyr. Right now, she's no different than anyone who has lost someone close to us." 

"Grief combined with one of the most powerful arsenals in the universe is not what I would call the norm. Nor is it a union that makes me sleep easy." 

"What was I supposed to do, Tyr? I don't suppose you have any better ideas?" 

"Confine her to quarters?" 

"To do what? Brood herself into a mood worse than before? No. It's better if she keeps busy." 

"Continuing this mission is a folly, Beka. Continuing it with an unstable AI is suicidal." 

"She's not unstable," Beka objected. 

"How can you be certain?" 

"I don't know, Tyr. The only thing I know is that if what we're doing is going to have even a chance of succeeding, then we need her. We need all the help we can get." 

Tyr remained silent a moment. "There is another option." When Beka did not reply, he leaned forward and said, "Forget this mission. These people Dylan consorted with obviously had their secrets. If, in fact, they brought this tragedy upon themselves, we are under no obligation. We owe them nothing, Beka." 

"We promised them--" 

"Dylan promised them." 

Beka hesitated. "I promised Dylan." 

"Dylan, is it?" said Tyr. 

"A promise Dylan made and a promise I made to Dylan. It's the same thing." 

"It is not the same thing!" Tyr objected, standing up. He stepped around the table and knelt in front of her. Still seated, Beka's head was level with his as he looked into her eyes . "Give me your word that you will seriously consider the risks you are taking with all of our lives, Beka." 

Her blue eyes stared back at him. "If you consider the lives we'll save if we take the risk." 

The long pause seemed to hold impending rejection, but Tyr stood upright and nodded. "Agreed." His voice rumbled. "And I will not take such a pledge lightly." He moved as if to go. 

"I know." She swallowed. "What I need to know is who'll be standing there with me. When it comes down to my decision, who can I really count on? Can I count on you?" 

His back was to her, but he paused in the doorway. "It depends on the choice you make. So, I will answer that," Tyr replied, darkly. "When the time comes."

His words lingered in the uncomfortable silence after he had gone.


End file.
